The Pressroom
Managers front up to the media. Read the latest from across the league.
"It's been 3 months at Shrewsbury. Are you where you hoped to be by now?"
Absolutely. Got a lovely gaff in Church Stretton, the fans love me, statue outside the ground, stand named after Sir Skelly the third. Life is great, god is great
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"Newcastle were beaten 7-6 by your side. The fans want more of the same - can you deliver it?"
Does Santa deliver presents to good children on Christmas?
Of course they do!
And of course, in this example, my team are santa and the fans are the good kids
Spurs fans have obviously been very naughty cos they're fuckin shit and getting nothing but L's
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"Jonathan Viera out, Sascha Horvath in, Ulsan Hyundai FC on the other end of the phone. Shrewd business or a swap you'll regret?"
Viera isn't our kind of player and we have watched Horvath at LASK before joining Ulsan in the summer. He's fantastic to have in the middle of the pitch and looking forward to his first appearance in the colours of FK Bodø/Glimt, potentially against his former side Ulsan Hyundai later this evening.
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"The fans are curious about academy prospect Kian Suzuki. What's the plan for the young CF?"
The plan is to run through everybody like a fat kid in a buffet line
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"You face Shrewsbury up next. Are you the hunter or the hunted in that one?"
Very good player and have very good games, I am being hunted, and I’m scared
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"23 goals for Thibault Klidje. Is he banging the door down for a bigger move, and should you be worried?"
We’ve already let him go, had another striker come in and not fair on klidje to be a bench warmer. Hes a great player wish him the best.
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"Fans rave about Claudiu Petrila's vision after 8 assists. Is he your most important player?"
The whole is stronger than the parts or some shit like that. Shoutout Dolly Parton man RIP to a great woman
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"The fixture computer hands you Kixrxn Mc21's Paris Saint Germain this season. Circle it in red, or just another game?"
End of the day it is another game, however we do have a special plan set for when the fixture arrives
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"You've got 28 tokens stashed. Are the agents already blowing up your phone?"
I am currently investing in the future of the club, I do not see a point in spending the cash.
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"The board has taken a chance on a fresh face. Tell the Premier League press pack who Utterchalice is — your style, your philosophy, and your ambitions for Nottingham Forest this season."
sometimes good sometimes maybe sh*t. win the league outvote everyone and win the league in my first season.
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"Matty11x at Everton clearly fancies their chances. Do you rate them, or is it all talk?"
Nah he’s not that good he only beat me by 2 this season (hope he wins the league tho)
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"You beat Barcelona 4-1 - the pundits didn't see that coming. Did you?"
Course! Barcelona ain’t the same anymore.
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